Poultry Poetry

photo credit: key lime pie yumyum via photopin cc

photo credit: key lime pie yumyum via photopin cc

One Requirement… Be sure to be wearing your sense of humor

before reading the following – just for fun Friday post…..

“Poultry Poetry”
(not about a chicken)

You walk like a chicken
Through the scratch you’re about to eat
You’ve pecked everything around you clean
Kicking the scraps beneath the coop to
Save for yourself…
You crow like the rooster that you are
Not to recognize the break of dawn
But just to listen to your own
Cock a doodle doo
You’ve chased every hen in the barnyard
Till their little bird legs are weak and worn
They can’t even lay an egg in peace
Without you crawling into their nests
Exposing your cockiness
I saw you this morning on top of the coop
You weren’t crowing like a rooster
You were squealing like a pig…
My first thought was that you were
One sick chicken…
But then, right before my own eyes
I realized that not even the sows are
Safe around you
Yesterday you rolled a dozen eggs
Beneath the fence to an awaiting fox
In trade for him to chase the hens
Into your little rooster cave
That you carefully constructed
In the corner of the barnyard
I noticed your collection of hen feathers
That you’ve stashed beneath the
Watering trough
Tokens from the chicks that you have charmed…
I think they’re beginning to see through
Your tempting doodle doo…
I’ve reached my last straw with you
I’m trading you to the neighbor
For his jackass…
I’m certain of your delight
For he has a mob of emu
That you can add to your conquests
I will miss you though…
The sounds of the screaming hens…
The sows wallowing in the mud
In their attempt to keep you off their backs
Your crowing at midnight
Howling at the moon like a wolf in heat…
I remember the time you chased Whinnie
The Shetland pony around the barn…
Her kicking you in the head with her back foot…
I took a picture of you lying on the ground on your back
Flopping your wings straight out at your sides
Wiggling the tips of both wings as if
Motioning Whinnie to come and get you…
With that smile on your beak…
I will miss you though…
There’s a barnyard party planned for your departure
The hens are even removing the barbed wire
From around their nests that they had placed there
To keep their chicks safe from your misguided voracity…
I see that you’re showing off your spurs
As you drag them around in the dirt…
I’ll expect you to be on your best behavior
When the neighbor brings over Myrtle the jackass…
You’d better keep your cock a doodle doo
Beneath your feathers…
But something tells me,
That by the time she arrives,
You will have learned to hee haw…

Copyright © 2014 All Rights Reserved

Don’t be draggin’ your spurs in the dirt…

I’ll be looking forward to your comments…

Have a humorous weekend…



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