The Rich Child… A Reality

Mikie 10F

The Rich Child

I grew up a rich child…
Rich in finding ways to entertain myself
Rich in having beautiful thick woods to explore
Behind my house
Complete with two ponds…
A very ummm… rustic treehouse
Crudely nailed to a huge old oak
Where the sound of cougars
Echoed through the night…
I was rich because I grew up
The forgotten middle child
Where I could roam free
And no one would miss me…
I was rich when I walked along
The railroad tracks
And lingered with the hobos
Making camp in the old
Deserted shale pit
Which often provided many hours
Of intrigue for a boy of ten…
Learning so young that life
Was often a struggle
While strangers offered to share
Their only can of beans…
I was a rich child
Because I survived scarlet fever
When I was twelve
Back in the days when there were many
Who did not…
I never could quite rise above the fray
Yet I still learned how to dance
Inside the rain…

I grew up a rich child
Sharing a room with a brother
Four years my elder
Who gave to me freely
The top bunk…
I was enriched with humbleness
With the birth of a sister
Ten years my junior
The ascendant child
In a too crowded world
Of the light
Of the verse
Of the rhyme…

I grew up in riches
With lies of the father
Deceit of the sister
And flight of the brother…
A mother
Who struggled to tend…
But I dwelled in riches
For I was forgotten
And left for the vultures to mend…
But the creatures all gathered around me
And lifted me far out to sea
Where family failed
To look in my eyes
I still found the way to be me…

The Rich Child 33

Family Secrets

Family Secrets 1

I suppose they had no choice
But to pretend
Though sadness in their faces
Stirred a fateful potent blend

I suspect the family secrets
Never crossed their mortal lips
Except when amber liquids
Shared the night with passing ships

But still there is the fractured ink
Left neath the bottom drawer
And bones that rattle softly
When the wood creaks in the floor

Stories left untold by those
Who passed without a word
Still linger in the gentle breeze
When ere the dust is stirred

Michael33

Until December

winter-2

Until December

The bitter winter chill has arrived…
A north wind blowing in
From some remote arctic location
That seldom wanders my mind…
………………..Until December

Cold air seeping through the cracks
In the walls of this old house…
Floors resembling the feel of an icy pond
Against my bare feet…
As the snow begins to fall
Atop the branches of the pine
My thoughts of winters past…
Of time before my aging eyes
Had turned from blue to gray…
Where a child could catch a snowflake
In the palm of his tiny hand
Turn his face toward the sky
And smile with innocence…

My bones absorb the cold
Far more than just the year before
Even with extra tallow
Having taken residence beneath my skin…
My feet still cold inside my shoes
No crackling fire to warm them…
Yet I recall the child who sat upon the hearth
Enchanted with the thought of snow
To fall upon the willow
Long before the feet of crows
Had graced my mellowed eyes…

This old kitchen table
Where I often scrawl the thoughts
Of a man more antediluvian
Than that of my own recollection…
Can speak of the laughter…
The sadness…
The tears…
The stories told by those much older…
Much wiser than I…
Molded into the marrow of its soul…
It wears the wine and whiskey spilled
Immersed into its grain
Like purple hearts against the soldiers breast…
It speaks of Christmas dinners past…
Of birthdays come and gone…
Of hands held both above
And neath the wood…
Chairs that creak and speak of those
Who rested in their mold
Yet never speak the secrets told
On snowy winter nights…

The sleet against the window pane
Like the sound of a thousand crows
Pecking at the nuts beneath the pine…
The wind is howling through the cracks
Of the crippled wooden door
Reminding me of those who’ve danced
Upon this icy floor…
The sound of old piano strings
Ringing in the night
The rhymes so often drowned
Within the laughter…
Long painted nails
Tapping time against the keys
With voices blending well
Through breath of beer…
Thoughts that sometime slip my mind
Like quivering neath the sheets…
Forgotten amidst the warmth of dreams…
……………………………Until December

Michael33

Copyright © 2016

“Knowing Love”

Love birds

photo credit: Fran Tapia via photopin cc

“Knowing Love”

 
I awoke this morning feeling that I was loved…
Something most long for
Yet something seldom truly felt in their soul…
There were no feelings of jealousy
No dread of the thought of her leaving
No wondering when I’d hear the first sound
Of breaking glass…
Not even a single thought of my blood
Dripping onto the pillow case…

I awoke this morning feeling undeserving…
Undeserving of the love that she offered
So willingly…
So uncomplicatedly…
Filling me with the sense of foreverness…
Needing no words to assure me of her truths
Of her intensions… of her desires…
They were all there before me…
Without the need for words
Without apologies
Without the lies
Without the tears that so often found their way
Into my heart…

I felt as though I must have died in my sleep
Passing through the veil into the depths of nirvana
Yet… I could touch her…
I could feel the softness of her skin upon my fingertips…
I could hear the gentle breath of a most enlightened human being
That loved me…
Me…..  
The one who had never felt the love that spoke of truths
The one who had never known love
Without doubts
Without lies
Without disappointments
Without the deepest emotional feelings
Of not being wanted
Not being desired by the one proclaiming her love…

My soul now knows that love in this lifetime
Has not evaded me…
The illusiveness of true love
Has poured itself all over my being…
It is a knowing
A knowing within the soul
That the one that it has ached for
Searched for
Prayed for
Longed for
Far beyond any other desire
Within your heart…
Has found their way into the core of your being…
Their beauty lying on the pillow next to yours…
The feel of their breath on your face…
The warmness of their touch…
The elevation of your spirit
Swelling within you when the one…
The One….. 
Does nothing but stand by your side…
Does nothing but allow you to feel the look upon their face
That assures you of their undying love…
You can feel it holding their hand…
You can feel it as your lips touch theirs…
You can feel it when they’re with you or away from you…
You can feel it by the absence of emptiness in your heart…

I will never be able to express what I feel in my heart…
In my soul…
Except to strive to assure that she knows my heart…
Knowing…..
Really knowing in her own heart…
Within her own soul…
That I love her too…

Copyright © 2014 Steven Michael Sanders

May you feel the warmness in their touch….

Michael33